So it was that I had yet another appointment to bring it in for service on my birthday last Monday. (I spent $400 on brake work the week before but the check-engine light was on and it was shaking when in reverse.) The verdict was another $500 repair plus confirmation the transmission was on its last legs (which we already knew). It was obviously time to "pull the plug" on the car.
I had been laboring under the impression that if I treated the car well and helped it get over its past abuse and neglect, I would be rewarded with a dependable, well-behaved vehicle. This was childishly anthropomorphic of me, I know. It sorta falls into line with "putting it out to the universe" type thinking--that never works for me either.
Old Jewish saying,"Do you know how to make God laugh?
Tell Him your plans!"
Upon reaching this dreaded decision, I was in such despair I asked Chad, the repair-shop supervisor if they had a "crying room". However, upbeat as ever, he said they could set me up with a leased car and turned me over a salesman to get the information. Long story short, I wound up buying a new car. It took half of my savings account and I'll be making car payments for the rest of my life, but I will have reliable transportation.
I'm telling myself that I did my bit for our economy. I just wish I could feel better about it.